Archive | 12:26 am

Verne’s first wank

5 Mar

My little creepy creature asked me this morning, as he was having breakfast:

Mommy, mommy, where do milkshakes come from?
Excited cows i answered.

I have never seen a cow, he said. Knowing he’s a very curious kid, and also a pain in the ass when he wants something…i decided to take him to visit Billy Bob Twolips’ farm.

He showed us his best cow. Daisy’s her name, “a true champion”. Seeing how peaceful she looked i couldnt wait to jump on her…and of course Verne wanted to do the same!

Can i have my milkshake now, please?, he said.
Of course, serve yourself!!!!, said Billy Bob.

Do you think he got scared of Daisy’s huge boobies? Noooo, and here’s the proof:

Right after finnishig his milkshake, and while poor Daisy was recovering from a heart attack, something caught his attention. He ran to a guy that was standing in the middle of a field and started making him questions like:

What’s the best way to keep milk from turning sour ?

The guy obviously wasnt answering…he was a friggin’ scarecrow!!!

I answered: just leave the milk inside the cow, you silly!!
Scarecrows can’t speak, Verne.
Mommy, mommy, what is a scarecrow?

To be continued…